Dining Experiences

So you want to go out and eat at a restaurant nothing to fancy but not too cheap just some good food and you do not feel like having to cook and clean yourself.

You make it to your destination and see the line of 200 people and shake your head and head to the next on your list you are not really craving it but, "Damn who wants to wait behind all those people?"

Ok so let us say you are at the next place; it still has a line waiting to be seated but this time it is only 50 deep. You get out lock up the car and go to door and have to wait as the family of 5 that together weigh at least 4000 pounds blocks the entrance. They smell food and look as if they are gonna attack the next waitress they see carrying a dish to the patrons that are already seated. We make our way past their sweaty ill fitting bodies barely able to contain the disgust as one of their jiggly arms tough me as I try to squeeze by to make it to the hostess station.

Finally I let out a breath finally able to breath and to my dismay I realize how crowded it actually is the smell of sweat is mingling with the aroma of food now and the heat of all these bodies packed in together starts my brow perspiring as well. But this is no matter I have made it I am looking at the young cute thing thats working as the hostess and inquire as to how long the wait is...

Waiting.... Waiting... Waiting...

You know she saw you she looked at us and smiled as we walked up but she lowered her head as soon as we asked the question and now shes not answering. What the hell is going on? Dunno but maybe she didnt hear me. "Ma'am Excuse me?" She totally ignores us and turns to her helper and starts chatting and having a conversation that probably has no bearing upon the time my wait will be.


Waiting....Waiting.... Waiting... Now I am growing impatient!


For those of you who do not know me I am 6'3" 211 pounds and look as Irish as a Leprechaun on St Paddy's. This I use to my advantage in times like these. I scowl so hard my forehead wrinkles up as if there is some extra skin that magically appears and says to you "Oh Shit! Help this guy out can't you see he is getting pissed?" This usually works I send my energy towards the person that she is talking to and they feel it burrowing into their cranium with such force and pressure that that just stop talking and tap the hostess and let her know she needs to help us.

Turning, the girl smiles innocently and asks "Can I help you?", like nothing happened! Well I forget it she is helping us now so "no matter".. I ask about the wait time again and she look at her paper and just makes up a number ~ I see it in her eyes ~ "It is only about 15 minutes we will call your name when the table is ready". I ponder "15 minutes? That really is not bad at all, cool. "


We make our way past the people back to the fresh air that inhabits the nether region past the fatties. Now all we can do is wait, wait ,and wait some more. The smell of food is intoxicating but our society has taught us in some Pavlovian way to act and do as we are told.


Ok enough of this story I am bored I'll maybe add to it another day......